Little Red Riding Hood. I am so sorry.
Today I was told that for tomorrow’s creative writing lesson I must take the story of Little Red Riding Hood, use my imagination and create a new version of it.
Turns out my imagination can be quite dark.
The PowerPoint asked me to jot down a word to describe my version of each of the main characters in the story.
Little Red Riding Hood – Addict
Wolf – Dealer
Granny – Senile
Huntsman – Detective
Doesn’t it already sound like a cheerful premise? I bet you cannot wait to read this as a bedtime story for little Jimmy. Well people read the Brother Grimm stories to their children, so, it could happen.
Just to add to the nitty gritty vibe I’m going for, I set it on a council estate. This isn’t a dig at council estates, I live on one. A council estate is just something I’m familiar with. This one is called “Uponthyme” cheeky little wink there to it being a retelling of a fairytale.
The heroine, Little Red becomes Lily Red, a coke addict, who has cheap bleach blonde hair, a cracked phone screen and a one bedroom flat. She isn’t based on anyone i know i swear. (Disclaimer: The Characters in this story are fictitious, any resemblance to characters alive or dead is purely coincidental) She also happens to own a RED hoodie (Wink).
The Villain of the tale. The Big Bad Wolf becomes the drug dealing Mr. Wolph. This is one Mofo you don’t want to mess with. He has no problem with being violent or threatening to women, and his GROWLING voice (Wink) quickly has Lily in a panic. But like all good friendly neighborhood dealers he does offer his ‘wares’ on tick. Just don’t try and rip him off.
We don’t really see much of Granny. One minute she smiling, the next she bleeding out the back of her skull. But she had to be in there somewhere.
The Huntsman is still the hero, but he isn’t actually a huntsman, but in some ways he has been hunting Mr. Wolph.
So there’s a girl in a red hood, a wolf, a granny, a huntsman, an axe, and even a form of picnic basket turns up in there somewhere.
It is the Little Red Riding Hood you read as a child, just a little twisted.
Maybe next time I’ll tackle The Three Little Pigs … But if i make the animals human in that story we will have cannibalism … Sorry Jimmy, your bedtimes are about to get a little darker.